“If only the kids would act differently, I’d feel better.” We also think, “If only my partner, my friend, my sibling, my parent, my boss, my president would act differently I would feel better.”
Whenever we turn our well being over to the actions of someone else we have given away our power. To reclaim our power is to know that we can feel better; in fact we can feel wonderful, no matter what an one else, including our children, our friends or the other parent is doing.
The next time you hear yourself thinking, “if only” remember that it is a code for relinquishing your power. The longer we wait for someone or something to change, the deeper we feel our powerlessness.
Reclaim your well being. You can change your thoughts. Instead of saying, “If only”‘ say, “Even though” or “It doesn’t matter” or “I am the creator of my own well being.”
See if you can give your attention to something that makes you feel good. Doing this without anger or judgment allows your empowerment to flow.