Say the word ‘discipline’ out loud three times quickly. Which part of the word gets the most emphasis? The ‘dis’ part.
I looked up the meaning of the expression ‘diss’. Popular agreement seems to be that it means to insult someone; speaking rudely or disapprovingly about someone. According to the Collins dictionary it is a slang verb and means to treat (someone) with contempt.
I am suggesting that when we parent our children with an intent to ‘discipline’ we fall into behaviors that insult, disapprove and treat our kids with contempt. No wonder they have such strong reactions and push back. I rarely meet a parent who wants to come at their children with such an unloving approach and yet so many people fall into the ‘discipline trap’.
It *IS* really challenging to be the parent we so want to be; especially when we are blessed with sensitive, intense, or power seeking children. These kids push our buttons and we find ourselves with a choice: We can take it all very personally and rev up the threats and punishments or we can seek ways of growing and expanding, in the process rediscovering our true power and ultimately falling in love with these kids all over again.
By the way, do you know where the word discipline comes from originally? From the world ‘disciple.’ The original disciples were taught by a teacher who modeled love, compassion and non judgment. When you interact with your children with an intention to compassionately love them from a place of non judgment, you might just experience your own personal miracle!
NEW DEFINITION OF DISCIPLINE: To teach love, compassion and non-judgement through modeling with our own behavior.