Natural and Logical Consequences

We all make choices and engage in behavior that creates the next experience. Consequences should not be used as punishments~ They need to be: • Naturally or Logically connected to the behavior • Known in advance when possible • Given in a firm but calm voice • Easy to apply and …

Judgement to Joy

We were sitting in a restaurant when I noticed the young couple in the corner. They were snuggling and kissing and just plain lovin’ each other. My initial thought was that it seemed inappropriate, but I realized if I stopped judging I would free myself to enjoy their sweet energy. …

Getting Them to Talk

Parents sometimes lament that their children don’t talk to them and when they do they give one word answers, “Fine.” “Nothing.” When children are little they jabber freely, sharing their thoughts, questions, desires, needs, feelings and vivid imaginations. Many times adults meet this outpouring of their inner world with condescendence, …

Redefining Discipline

  The reason using emotionally healthy discipline is hard is because PARENTS MUST DISCIPLINE THEMSELVES and model the very behavior wanted from the children. Listen to our MP3, “Redefining Discipline” to learn more about this very important topic.  

The Art of Appreciation

Become an appreciation detective! Model for your children, through your own behavior, the power of appreciation. Seek out reason to be thankful for throughout your day. Look for the good in everyone and every situation that you encounter. Teach your children through your own example that there is always some …

Our Work as Parents

Our role as parents is not to please others so they will complement us on the good job we are doing in raising well behaved kids. Our purpose is to support and unconditionally love our children as they discover who they are, who they came to be and to give them the …

Enoughness

The new little babies come into life knowing their value. They trust they are enough. Toddlers are certain that they are deserving of the best that life has to offer them and from their vantage point they expect to have it all! So when do we start believing that we …

The Gift of Understanding

Have you ever savored a moment when you were understood and appreciated as a unique and precious human being? Do you remember how pleasant it felt not to have to please anyone or complete a task and just rejoice in the freedom of being yourself? With all the pressures of …

Lit With Joy

I can’t get this question out of my mind: “When your children walk into the room do your eyes light up with joy?” I work with so many parents and grandparents who search for ways to enrich their children’s self esteem. I usually suggest they stop noticing what the kids …

Love or Fear

As parents we know how it feels to love our children and to also worry about them. I have learned, however, that while we can experience sensing the feelings of love and fear we cannot live in both at the same time. What does this actually mean? It translates in …

Living From the Inside Out

Just about everything makes me think about parenting and relationships. Today it was the laundry. Since my mind works in metaphors I started thinking about the similarities and differences between laundry and parenting. They both are never ending and seem to run in cycles. In the same way that the …

Parenting Magic

To be a parent is to taste the agony and ecstasy of being human. It is more complicated than many of us thought it would be ~ Especially when you have a challenging child. Parenting can reduce successful men and women into a stressful state of confusion. Adults who see …

Worry Less, Love More

I used to think that a good mother was supposed to worry. After all, how can you love your children and not worry about them? My mother worried about me—all of the time. In fact, I grew up equating love with worry. I have even accused my husband at times …

It’s All In Our Perception

I was taking my daily walk when I passed an elementary school playground with children at recess. “You’re lucky!” a young girl shouted to me. “Why do you say that?” I smiled back. “Because you’re free to take a walk and I’m stuck in school!” I thought that her perception …

A Promise to Our Children~

I will never treat you like you are my property or that your role in life is to please me or soothe my fears and worries. I know that I am merely a soul who is experiencing life in a human body and just because you’ve physically come through me …

Mind Chatter

You do not want your children to behave well because they fear you. You want them to make good choices because it feels good, because they want to and because they are in their own power when they do so. YOUR WORK is to shift the mind-chatter that takes their …

Your Children Mirror Your Inner World

Our children can feel our energy. They take in our stress, our fears, our joy, our love. It travels through their bodies, their hearts, their minds and comes out in their behavior. What is your child’s behavior telling you about yourself? If there is anything you would like to change …